If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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