you traded sex for a burrito?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
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I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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