God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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