Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize