The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
that may or may not have been my penis.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize