So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
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I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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