and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize