sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize