? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I had to cum in my sink.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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