My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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