So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
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just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
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So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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