we have pet lesbian snakes
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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