I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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