So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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