just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize