That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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