I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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