Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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