I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize