then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize