I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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