The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
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I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize