Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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