its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
meet me or not, i'm out of control
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
