Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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