Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
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i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
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Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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