And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize