It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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