The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize