and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
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Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
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The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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