In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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