no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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