If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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