I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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