peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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