I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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