can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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