Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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