Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
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i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
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thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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