i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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