Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize