At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize