we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
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Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
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So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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