I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Apparently you make a good broom.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize