we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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