so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize