Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Apparently you make a good broom.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize