she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
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i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
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If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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