you traded sex for a burrito?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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