he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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