There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize